Sometimes, the only thing that's standing in your way is yourself.
If you are an overthinker, you want to do many different things, and feel like you know what you need to do, but still can't take the first step, you're going to resonate a lot with Ale in this on-air coaching episode.
Ale from Mexico has been looking for something to fulfill her. After being intoxicated by a pill a doctor gave her to cure her depression, Ale was ill for almost six months, which made her rethink her life and question everything. She's currently interested in creating a business and has several great ideas, but feels overwhelmed with where to start and doesn't fully believe in herself.
IN TODAY’S EPISODE, WE TALK ABOUT:
How to determine what exactly is holding her back
Why there's more to moving forward in life than just what you think
How to release the heavy weight on your shoulder that's keeping you stuck
Why having clear conversations with loved ones are key for your worthiness
Why you are ready now (and don't need x, y, or z before you can be ready)
How to ask for help without feeling like a failure
And so much more!
Have you downloaded the free Self-Care Guide for Perfectionist? Click here to access it:
martinafink.lpages.co/perfectionist-bundle
EPISODE RESOURCES
Self-Care Guide for Perfectionists
CONNECT WITH ALE
instagram.com/alejglz
TODAY’S EPISODE TRANSCRIBED:
Martina Fink 0:00
This is episode number 138 with Ale Gonzales. Welcome to the Glow Life podcast. The one and only place for ambitious, high achieving and perfectionist women like you who want to leave, overwhelm behind. Turn self doubt into self confidence. And learn to trust yourself again, so that you can work less fully love and accept yourself and live a fulfilled and glowing life. Every week, I'll be giving you tips and inspiration on how to think less, feel more slow down and use your body and your daily habits to help you step up, level up and glow up in all areas of your life. This is not just about the big shifts, you can glow just a little more every single day.
Martina Fink 1:03
Welcome back to the glow Live podcast. Today we're doing an on air coaching session, which is some sort of a behind the scenes of what it looks like to work with me. And we condense that into a podcast episode. Now my guest today la from Mexico, which is exciting. And I we have never talked before, we have only messaged a few times on Instagram to arrange the time for this podcast episode. So this is a very raw and real conversation we've never worked together before. We never met before this is real and authentic. So I'm really excited to share this conversation with you and kind of give you a little bit of an insight into what coaching truly looks like and can look like. And before we get started, I do want to share as always my glow Tip of the Week with you. And it is very connected to what we are covering in today's conversation. And it is to get out of your head into your heart. Most probably you are a perfectionist and perfectionists have a tendency to overthink because we want to have everything look perfect, be perfect. And in order for us to get there, we need to have a very good plan, we need to have a to do list we need to figure it out. And that requires a lot of thinking. Now here's the thing, when we think so much, we have all of our energy in our head. And I want you to think about like your body physical body, all of the energy is in your head, that can cause a lot of pressure on your head, which can lead to headaches, and nauseous feelings, it can lead to dizziness and things like that, right. So when you have all of your energy in your head, then the rest of your body is not full of energy at all it has, in fact no energy. And that part of your body includes your heart, all of your energy is in your head, no energy is in your heart. So therefore, when you overthink things, you are completely cut off from how something feels for you. And that is one of the first steps that I work with my clients on is to connect back to the heart. Think about how you are feeling think about how something is feeling for you. You know, so many people are working so hard and so much. And they think they have to because that's a story. And that's the energy going on their head. But if we actually think about how that feels for us, it probably doesn't feel that good. Probably a lot of pressure, probably a lot of frustration. And being able to tap into those feelings that you have in your heart. It's a skill. It's like when you go to the gym and you're strengthening your muscles, learning to feel your emotions is the exact same thing. If you've never really connected with your heart before, if you are completely disconnected from your feelings. Chances are the first time you talk about this is not going to be a super emotional session. Because you have built layers around your heart you have built a protection around your heart so that nobody can see how you truly feel. So my question or my challenge for you today is to get out of your head into your heart, whatever that means. Maybe it means closing your eyes and having your hands on your heart. Maybe it means dancing to your favorite song. While taking a break from work and getting out of your head into your feelings. Maybe it means doing a beautiful meditation. Maybe it means Lighting a candle and having some essential oils going in your house. Tune into your heart. It is so knowledgeable It is so wise it will always have answers. For your questions, and now, I'm so excited to bring on Allah Gonzalez from Mexico. Sometimes the only thing that's standing in your way is yourself. And if you are an over thinker you want too many different things at the same time and you feel like you know what you need to do but still can't take that first step you're going to resonate a lot with Ali in this on air coaching episode today. Now, Allah has been looking for something to fulfill her and after being intoxicated by a pill that a doctor gave her to cure her depression, Ella was ill for almost six months, which made her rethink her life and question everything. She is currently interested in creating a business and has several great ideas, but feels overwhelmed with where to start and doesn't fully believe in herself. In today's episode, we talk about how to determine what exactly is holding her back why There's more to moving forward in life than just what you think how to release the heavy weight on your shoulders that's keeping you stuck, why having clear conversations with loved ones are key for your worthiness, why you are ready now. And don't need X, Y or Z before you can be ready, and how to ask for help without feeling like a failure, and so much more. And you can find everything we talked about today in the show notes at Martina Fink comm slash podcast slash 138. Welcome Ale, I am so grateful to have you on the podcast today.
Ale González 6:36
Thank you, thank you for having me.
Martina Fink 6:37
So today we're doing an on air coaching session, which means that we're really going to dive into some of your personal struggles and just get you some clarity around what your next steps are towards your what I call a glowing life for you personally. So what would you say is the biggest struggle that you're experiencing right now?
Ale González 6:59
I think that they're they're like, there is a lot of things that I want to do. But each of them are like going through the same direction. But they're like different things. And I don't know, like how to connect all like all the dots or all the things that I want to do to go to that direction.
Martina Fink 7:19
Yes. So it sounds like you have a lot of ideas. And all of them are similar and connected, but you don't know what exactly you want to do. Yeah. So tell me a little bit more about all these many things that you want to do.
Ale González 7:35
Well, I for the last year, I mean, 2018 I started like a business that is about Organa stating like houses like your kitchen, your law said and all that like everything you want to get organized. I wanted to work with that. And it was not just about cleaning and organizing, but also like to bring consciousness to your life every day, you wake up and you see the same stuff you have in your house. So it was more about being conscious about what you have in your home. Like make every thing every every little thing that you have in your house, make it special, like it really brings you joy to your life. So I started with that. But then three months later, after that, they complete things started so I couldn't like start like really, really start with that. And then I was like really struggling also with being like alone with these, these months. And something that really helped me it was a lot of exercises and tools that I learned through the last like four or three years. And it was meditating and journaling and all that like tools. And one thing I made like it was not more like a business. But it was something that I wanted to make for other people because that was the thing that made me feel better. It was I created like a self no journal that he was about all these tools, and I made it for myself. But then I felt like it this is what is missing in other people's lives to feel like comfortable being alone or being with themselves or being just like locked down in their houses. So I made this like journal that it's about also bringing consciousness to your life. How are you leaving what is bothering you about being by yourself, what is bothering me about you like being alone and just you know, having a relationship with yourself. So these are like two things that I created in the last two years. And then this year, I went to another course that is about energy and bringing awareness also in consciousness to your life, that it's like moving energy in your head. So I have these three things, that it's basically about Paying attention to every detail in your life and knowing what's what's working for you. What do you really want? And like, move on with that and leave the rest behind. So that's the three things that I, I kind of like working with, but don't know how exactly to put them together.
Martina Fink 10:19
Right. Okay, great. And so the last one that you shared around moving energy around, like, is that some sort of energy healing practice? or?
Ale González 10:29
Yeah, it's called access bars. I don't know if you have listened about that before. But it's like touching 32 points in your head. And with that, when I talk to them, I move the energy about all the like, the ideas, the all the things that you were like, raceways, that does not serve you anymore. So it's like that energy?
Martina Fink 10:54
Yeah. So basically, it helps. It's like energy work that helps reprogram your subconscious mind kind of thing to get rid of like limiting beliefs and blocks, expand your mind, is your question. Now, which of these ones do I go with? Or is your question how can I combine the two? Or is your question like, I don't even know what I'm doing?
Ale González 11:17
Well, I enjoy doing the three of them. Yeah, I mean, I like them. That's why I like created them. But I don't know. I mean, I'm struggling, because I don't know how to like how to get started, like I started already. But with the organization thing, it's, it's more like difficult, because I don't know why I cannot like make it work, if I can say like that. But yeah, I mean, I want to like bring them all together. And like, just let people know that this is what I work in. One is not like separated from the other because it's all about awareness and getting rid of what doesn't work for you anymore.
Martina Fink 12:02
Right? And let's check in with how this actually feels for you. So how are you feeling about knowing that you have these three things and you don't know where to start?
Ale González 12:11
Well I mean, I start I already but I, I feel like I cannot lay tell people, or I don't know how even I started. I already like put on my social media, I do this, I work with this and everything. But I don't know what's missing from me that it's not like attracting the people I want to work with.
Martina Fink 12:37
Right. And so I will ask the same question. Again, you haven't really answered it, I can sense that you have a lot going on your mind, there's a lot of thinking a lot of like, I don't understand, I don't know what to do. There's a lot like a lot of energy up here, right? So what I want you to do is take a moment and drop into your heart to maybe even like place your hand on your heart and close your eyes for a minute. And I want you to think about the situation with the three ideas that you have. And some of them you have already started. And you have already posted about them and shared with others about them. But it's not really going the way you wanted to. So how can you describe that feeling that is present in your heart right now? Is there a specific word that comes to mind?
Ale González 13:31
I don't know. Probably. I mean, it's something that I've been also struggling with any slights like confidence, like, I know I can do this. And it's like, it's like, I want to do it. But I feel sometimes I feel confident about it. And sometimes I don't.
Martina Fink 13:50
Okay, close your eyes again. Is there a specific place or space in your body where you're feeling something? tension, heaviness, lightness, excitement, anything?
Ale González 14:04
Well, yeah, I'm feeling like a heaviness in my shoulders and also in my lower back.
Martina Fink 14:10
And if you keep your eyes closed, tune into that heaviness on your shoulders and on your lower back. Just kind of be present. Be conscious about those feelings there. Is there a specific color that comes with that heaviness?
Ale González 14:33
gray
Martina Fink 14:34
if there's specific like texture or shape or temperature or something that you can also identify
Ale González 14:44
Is just like normal temperature and it doesn't have a like a figure or something. It's just like, I don't know like a fountain of color if I can, like describe it like that. Like getting in my shoulders.
Martina Fink 14:59
Okay. Beautiful, and just stay there for a bit.
Martina Fink 15:07
You're constantly carrying this gray, heaviness around with you. And let's just say it's probably not very helpful for what you're trying to do. So you can consciously choose to remove this gray heaviness. What do you think would be helpful for you to get rid of this weight on your shoulders?
Ale González 15:31
To be less perfectionist with myself?
Martina Fink 15:37
Where are you perfectionist with yourself?
Ale González 15:39
Like right now? What I, sometimes I don't start things because I think that they're always missing something. So it's always like, I have to do everything perfect. And that, like, I'm trying to work with that with me.
Martina Fink 16:00
Beautiful. So for now, can you imagine and visualize that you just take this gray shoulder weight off your shoulders, almost like a backpack, you take it off and you, you put it down next to you. And then you can walk away without that weight and that heaviness on your shoulders. Just leave it there. And then whenever you're ready, you can come back and open your eyes. Beautiful. Well done. wasn't that difficult was it? So let's talk about this perfectionism thing that's holding you back. So you always feel like there's something missing, I still need to do X in order for me to be ready. Right? Yeah. Do you have a specific example where this is currently happening?
Ale González 16:57
Well, I've been working with this for a long time already. But I think I still need to work with that. But yes, I think with the organization thing, it's, it's probably it's more with that, like, straw, I'm struggling more with that. Because it's a I never feel like prepare enough to start to do and to go start with a client and make that work. And always like, I'm always feeling like, No, I'm not gonna be like, ready. And if she asked me something, or if he asked me something, I am not gonna know how to answer. And I've been working with that. And like, letting myself not know the answer. Like if I'm a human, and it's okay, if I don't know him, or with a making, like, course, because I also love the moon and the faces and how to work with the faces with the moon. And I'm also doing a course about the moon. And it's like, no, it's missing something. It's not complete enough, even though it has already a lot of information on it. And it's always like, I'm not ready, like, how am I going to do this? Or is it enough? Also that like, most of the times, I think, like most of the things I do are never enough.
Martina Fink 18:13
Yeah, thank you for sharing this. Can you recall a situation in your life where something that you did was not enough? Like any situation, in the past, something you experienced earlier in your life?
Ale González 18:28
I cannot remember right now, but I do remember one thing that happened, like, not long ago, if I can share that, it was I was telling my dad, like, I'm doing this course. And I'm preparing these things because I wanna, you know, like, work with this and, and do these things that I have been working with that I know how to tell people how to do it. And he was like, Oh, yeah, but you better know exactly everything you're going to present. Because I mean, you're gonna teach it and I was like, I know where it came from. I mean, it's not that I'm saying it is my father's fault, because like, that's the way he grew up. But I know where my my feeling comes from that. It doesn't have to be perfect. It like if something's missing. Well, I'm human, of course, I'm going to be prepared. Of course, I'm going to study first. But I don't know. Like, I don't have to be it doesn't have to be perfect. I don't need to be perfect in order to do that.
Martina Fink 19:24
Yeah. And there's always the logical mind. Like, what you're telling me now is like, I don't need to be perfect. You know, I'm human. I can figure this out. When someone asks me a question, I will find the answer. And then there's also your somatic body, your energetic body that has experiences from the past that you're carrying around with you like that gray feeling that you had, it's probably part of your dad's weight on your shoulder that's telling you this is what you need to do. And I would assume that you're feeling this way, not just since that conversation, right? You probably felt like this to all your entire life. Right, yeah. So currently you are carrying around these beliefs that your dad has, which he has from his dad or from his parents and they had from their parents, right. And so, exactly, you get to choose that you don't want to buy into this. And as much as we love and respect our parents, and, you know, we may or may not agree with what they believe in, you have this choice to break this cycle and say, You know what, I'm just gonna click unsubscribe to this belief. It's easier said than done, for sure. But consciously say, you know what, thank you, dad. But this is not helpful for me. And I know that I am enough. So what do you think would be helpful for you to kind of cut that cord that is still connected to your dad in his beliefs, which are also your beliefs at the moment.
Ale González 20:59
I'm actually working with that, because, like, I'm working with myself about that. And it's something that I want to work with people like to tell them to break that. And you don't have to believe everything your parents, like, believe or whatever. And it's something that I want to work with other people. So actually, like, now I have like tools that I learned from the Access Consciousness thing. That is everything that you are conscious, that is not yours, you just destroyed and say, it's not mine, I give it back to the sender. And that's his idea. That's his belief. It's not mine. And I don't want to, I don't want to keep carrying that believe with me. So that's what I'm currently doing. Like being conscious about the situation of courses. It still pisses me off sometimes, because he's like, stop telling me that like, it's not, it's not going to help. But I know, he's not making that to make me feel bad. He's just like, his the way his brain works.
Martina Fink 22:06
Right.. It sounds like what you are working on is kind of changed things in your energetics and in your beliefs. And like, like I said, like cutting those cords and just take ownership of what you believe. Have you thought about having a conversation with him?
Martina Fink 22:23
Oh, I already did.
Martina Fink 22:24
Okay.
Ale González 22:25
Like, not once, like many, many times, but now I'm, I'm not like attached to that. Because I because I've been I've done that so many times that I right now. It's just like, okay, that I love you. But there's like a limit between this and like, like, between you and me with these things. So yeah, I don't fight against that anymore.
Martina Fink 22:48
Beautiful. So you feel like it's no longer affecting you what he says.
Ale González 22:52
In a way does, but now I'm conscious about it. So now I'm aware that I can tell him or me, not him. But just in my mind, I can say like, okay, that's not mine. I don't have to carry,
Martina Fink 23:04
Right. How does it make you feel when he tells you what to do?
Ale González 23:09
Well, sometimes it makes me feel like worthless, because he's like that. This is the thing I want to do, instead of saying that you can just support me and say, okay, like Kip starting, or how can I help you with? And it's just but it's that feeling that makes me feel like, it's not going to be it's not going to end? Okay, that it has like this heavy weight on my shoulders?
Martina Fink 23:34
Do you feel angry about it? or frustrated? or anything like that?
Ale González 23:39
Yeah, frustrated sometimes. Yeah.
Martina Fink 23:41
And I assume you have already told him the kind of support you need from him.
Ale González 23:46
I think I did. I don't recall like, the exact moment. But I like I remember like, saying to him something about, I'm trying to change this part of me to please, if you don't agree, or you don't understand, just please be quiet. I don't need you to understand I just need you to accept me the way that I'm trying to move on.
Martina Fink 24:08
Yes. Okay. So potentially, there might be an opportunity here for you to express the kind of support you desire, because one thing is to just have him shut up and not say anything. And another thing is, hey, me, Ali, I would love some support from you, Dad, can you please encourage me, you know, tell me, I'm great. Like, give me compliments, whatever it is that you need. And there's no right or wrong here. But I do know that people like you and I Who are you know, have a tendency for perfectionism and want to be like, look like we have it all together all the time may struggle with asking for help and saying, you know, I actually need some support here.
Ale González 24:55
Yes. Yeah, of course definitely is something that I've been struggling with.
Martina Fink 25:01
Yeah, I understand
Ale González 25:02
No, no, just about the thing that you say like asking for her for help. It's so hard for me.
Martina Fink 25:10
Why?
Ale González 25:11
I don't know. It's just, I think the way you said it describes it perfectly, because you want to look like, like, everything's perfect even though you know, it's not asking for help. I don't know, sometimes I don't like to ask for help, because I don't like people to like to worry about me. Because I by always seem like, at the end, I'm not I know, I'm going to be okay. At the end, I know, I'm gonna, I'm gonna find a solution to this problem. Again, I'm not I'm gonna go through this by myself. But it doesn't have to be like that all the time. And that's why I think I, I have like issues like asking for help.
Martina Fink 25:58
Yeah. And we always do certain things, because we benefit from them in a certain way. So there is some sort of a benefit for you to not ask for help. Does that make sense? Like, there is something that you're getting out of this, that you're not asking for help? What do you think that is?
Ale González 26:18
I think it's like, proving myself that I can do anything by myself that I'm capable to do it without any help. And why is that important? Because of the thing that I told you before about, like feeling worthless or feeling bad? Everything I do is not it's not? It's not that it's not perfect, but I'm not. I'm never, I never feel ready. So I think that it's like something that I say to myself that, okay, prove to yourself that you can do that. And you're gonna like, feel like you are worth it or feel like you can do this or feel, I don't know, like this kind of feelings that are just like proving myself the other way around that. I feel sometimes.
Martina Fink 27:12
Yeah. And is it more about you feeling like, oh, now I've done this, now I feel worthy, or is it that now that you've done this, you get approval from other people? And other people are actually, like, proud of you and supportive?
Ale González 27:27
Well, not really, because when I go through things, most of the times I don't tell people anything. I'm like a very, not lonely person. But I like to keep my stuff to myself and the people that maybe my family, but not even then sometimes. So it's just that I know I'm capable of, but I don't even like, I think Yeah, sometimes I actually I actually looked for the approval of my dad, like I did this. So you can see now that I, I could do it. And I don't know I'm capable.
Martina Fink 27:59
What does it look like when he approves of you look like or feel like or?
Ale González 28:05
I have this feeling of? It's weird, because I know it. Like it shouldn't be like that, just like saying something. But it feels like, finally he had he sees me. Or he's not that he doesn't. But it's like this feeling like or he realizes that I'm capable of everything I want and he didn't think of.
Martina Fink 28:31
So almost like you have to prove to him that you are good enough.
Ale González 28:35
Exactly, yeah.
Martina Fink 28:37
Interesting. And I would love to go deeper into your relationship with your dad and kind of understand how that how it came to this point. Because I feel like there would be a lot more to uncover. But the thing I want to also bring to your awareness is that feeling of like you said, when you prove yourself that you're capable of doing something, then you feel worthy. So how I understand is that you connect your worthiness with your accomplishments. Would you say that this is true?
Ale González 29:09
Yeah.
Martina Fink 29:10
So in that case, you will only feel worthy of whatever work you're going to do with all these projects, once you accomplish them. And my question for you is, how can you feel worthy as you are right now?
Ale González 29:25
Well, as I said before, I've been working with this like, for like, almost four years. So I obviously I have some struggles that I need to work more on. But now, I mean, there that's a one part of me feeling worthy of accomplishing this part of my life. But now, like I feel worthy when I listen to myself when I give time to myself, when I take some time to feel what I'm feeling, and if I don't feel good, I like stop everything and I put myself first. That's how I feel feel worthy, like, these times?
Martina Fink 30:04
Beautiful? So are you only stopping and prioritizing yourself when you're not feeling quote unquote good? Or is that something that you do every day?
Ale González 30:14
It's something that I do every day, I try to do it every day, every morning, I, the first, probably one hour, two hours of the day, I gave those hours to myself. It's just the things I want to do. The things that make me feel good, and the things that are going to make me feel good through the day, like changing my mindset, or Yeah, doing all this, this kind of stuff that it's, it's good for me like, it's good to do it for myself.
Martina Fink 30:42
What do you think is really holding you back?
Ale González 30:44
with the business thing?
Martina Fink 30:48
Yeah.
Ale González 30:48
I think it's that that I, I know what it is, like, I started interior design. But then I love interior design, and I love doing that. But now my, the thing I want to do is completely different to that. And because I don't have like a career, or I didn't study that, like, professionally, I'm afraid that people are not going to work with me. But this is something that I tell to myself, every time I think of this and is like Yeah, well, you didn't go to university to study that. Would you have been studying it for four years because of your experience? So it's like, it's almost the four years of one career one, like going to university or whatever. So I think sometimes is that that I don't know, anywhere in the world is like the same, but here in my country is like you are worth your career, your car degree, everything. So that's probably somehow something that it's holding me back.
Martina Fink 31:52
Yeah, I understand that. And the question is, you know, are you just going to roll with it? And continue to tell yourself, you know, I know enough. And I know, I'm worthy. And I know I have the knowledge? Or are you going into the direction of you know, what, actually some sort of is certification, or course what really helped me, I'm sharing this because for me, when I first started, I was still a couple, many years ago, I was still doing makeup, I was teaching makeup courses, I was doing workshops, and talking all about beauty. And I started noticing that so many people needed more support with like confident things and inner things and, you know, lifestyle stuff, and not just beauty and makeup. And I didn't know, like I could have read all the books and all the things. But for me, it was like, I would love to actually learn how to be a proper coach and how to, you know, just have more knowledge. And I did that for myself, because I felt like if I can properly learn that it would be really good for me it was less for for me personally was less about having a certification that can prove to others that I did it. But I knew I had to take the certification for me because I knew that going through that it would give me a lot of confidence. And in that case, it was a it was a decision for me out of love knowing that when I do this, I will feel really good because I have the knowledge and my backpack, right? And so for you, my question would just be are you not doing anything? Like? Are you now starting career in that? Because you truly feel like you know enough? Or are you or would you just do it so that you can have some sort of a certification to prove to others that you have done this?
Ale González 33:36
I wouldn't do it for the second day. Like I wouldn't do it for the Yeah, like for other people to look at me and see Oh, and she has a degree, definitely. It's just black. So like I said, it's it was and it is because I wanna learn more to be better with me and with other people with me and my family and my friends because I wanna, like, I want to help and I want to bring this awareness into my life and try to help other people. So it's, it's also because I want to be a better person.
Martina Fink 34:11
So then why does it mean so much to you? what other people think that you don't have a career?
Ale González 34:18
I don't know. It's I think it's one belief that I have like really, really, really deep down in my body like attached there, that I need to let it out and let it go. And I because it's not working for me anymore.
Martina Fink 34:31
Yeah. How can you let that go?
Ale González 34:33
I think that just trusting in what I know now I'm telling myself that I can help people and keep learning and then help more people and keep learning. like not even like finished studying in a year or two years. Like, I really like learning about different topics and everything. So I think it's going to be a part of me that it's going to always They're like always taking courses, always learning something new. So I think just embracing that part.
Martina Fink 35:08
Yes. always learn new things. And you already know enough to. Yeah, I want you to repeat after me and then you finish the sentence, I want you to repeat, I am ready now to and then you start like whatever you're gonna say all the things you're ready for. Okay?
Ale González 35:23
Okay.
Martina Fink 35:24
Okay. I am ready now to,
Ale González 35:27
I am ready now to start a business where I can help other people to bring awareness into their lives, ready to help other people to feel good with themselves. I'm ready to let go everything but it's not helping me anymore. I'm ready to feel that I'm worth it. I'm ready to let know other people that I know enough to help them. I'm ready to start with this now.
Martina Fink 36:00
Amazing. How does that feel? Did it feel like you actually believed yourself?
Ale González 36:05
Yes.
Martina Fink 36:07
Amazing. So we have so many stories in our minds that we keep telling ourselves like, I'm not ready, I need to do X before I can do that. And in those moments, whenever these thoughts come up, because they will, I want you to tell yourself, I am ready now. And maybe you need some sort of like a post it note on your computer, on your bathroom mirror on the door that's behind you. And like you see it several times a day that you are ready now because it's a very typical thing for perfectionist to think I still need to do this before I can be ready, I still need to learn this before I can be ready. And so with that belief, you will never be ready because you're you believe you're not ready now. And so now is the only time we have. And when you can tell yourself, I am ready now. It is a really powerful thing.
Ale González 37:00
Yeah, for sure.
Martina Fink 37:01
The last thing I want to say to you, as someone who you know, has a certification and has worked with hundreds of people at this point. Nobody has ever asked me for it. Like literally nobody. And it is on my website. If you go look in detail, you will find it there. But people don't care about necessarily about what you have studied. They care about the energy that you emit. So I want you to embody what you teach, I want you to live what you teach, I want you to be a role model and live by example. So that it's no longer, you know, kind of us selling other people that you are doing home organizations, it is that they already know because they see it all over the place. Because that's who you are. It's not what you do. It's who you are. So the question and maybe that's like, my homework for you is to how can you embody everything that you teach? How can you be that instead of just do that as your job, and you might already be that, but you might not truly show that side of you.
Ale González 38:15
I mean, just I can be that reminding to myself every day, every morning, like I most of the times do, but there's like, there's something there that what I mean, like I'm capable. And I know like deep down. I know I'm capable, and I can help other people. But it's just like reminded me every day that as you say like, I'm worth it, I'm ready to do it. It's not that I'm going to stop here about why I've learned. But for now it's enough. And day by day, I'm going to keep studying more and more and more and more. But for now today, it is enough.
Martina Fink 38:56
Beautiful. Well done. What would you say is your biggest lesson from this session? Your biggest learning
Ale González 39:03
That I know that I have what I need already within me.
Martina Fink 39:09
Yeah. Beautiful. You absolutely have everything you need. You are so enough, you know everything you need to know. You just need to truly believe in yourself. And know that with every day that you're holding yourself back. You're not helping the people that actually need your help.
Ale González 39:30
Yeah, exactly. Yeah.
Martina Fink 39:33
Thank you so much for being so brave and sharing so much of your personal life and experiences with us. I wish you all the best for your business. I'm so excited to see more of what you do and how you do it and who you are on on your social media in particular, which we will also link in the show notes. Is there any final words that you would like to say to everyone listening
Ale González 40:00
Well, first of all, thank you for having me. And thank you for all your comments and your questions and everything. And well, something that I would like to say to everyone is that I discover every day is the answer. You're looking for is already within you just need to look within.
Martina Fink 40:21
Beautiful, beautiful and take that advice for yourself and look for that answer with everything that you're struggling with in your business and just know that you're really the only person that can give you the answers. Thank you so much. I am so grateful to have had this conversation with LA and help her see that she is so enough and so ready and so worthy right now without another course another certification or having or needing to have more knowledge. If you are struggling with a similar situation where you're feeling overwhelmed where you're controlling or you're stressed out and you feel like you have a low self worth and some kind of negative self talk at times and are struggling with perfectionism. You really want to go grab your self care guide for perfectionist in the show notes below. If you need support with any of this please feel free to reach out to me for support you can reach me on instagram or facebook at Martina glows or if you are on my website we can also get in touch with the contact form it would mean the world to me if you left us a review for this episode if this has been helpful for you. And if it has inspired you to live in even more glowing life for yourself. Follow the glow life podcast on iTunes and Spotify and for everything we mentioned in today's episode, you can go check out the show notes at Martina Fink comm slash podcast slash 138. If there is a somebody that you absolutely love that really needs to listen to this episode, please forward it to them right now. Thank you so much for being here today and for caring for yourself so deeply because what you do for yourself is going to impact every single soul that you touch. You deserve to feel glowing and confident. Beautiful.
