Holistic Health

#131 Setting Boundaries to Reduce Overwhelm with Catherine Lewis (On-Air Coaching)

 
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Yes, of course I will help you! 

Yes, of course I can do this for you!

Yes, of course I can skip my workout and meditation today!

When you always say yes to everyone and everything, you end up feeling depleted with neither energy nor time for yourself. And you start feeling overwhelmed with all the life responsibilities you've taken on.

Time to reestablish some clear boundaries with yourself around when it's time for YOU to recharge and also stick to these boundaries yourself.

Catherine Lewis is on this episode for an on-air coaching session, where we will identify what the root cause of her overwhelm is, and what she can do to step out of it and take better care of herself.

Over the years, Cath has struggled with weight, PCOS and hormonal issues, high expectations of herself since she was a teenager, and never having time for herself, because she's either working, there for her husband, her dog, friends, and family, which has hugely impacted her mental health and stress levels. 

IN TODAY’S EPISODE, I’M COACHING CATHERINE THROUGH:

  • How to lower the high expectation you have of yourself that make you feel fuzzy in your head

  • What to prepare and not get overwhelmed when you have to go back to work after a long time in isolation

  • What happens when you're too flexible and too giving all the time (hint: not good!)

  • A powerful heart/emotion exercise to figure out why she's stuck with her self-care

  • How to prioritize yourself when you want to be the best in everything

  • How to set better boundaries with herself

  • The no. 1 (+ super simple!) thing Catherine needs to do now to decrease the overwhelm of life responsibilities

And so much more! 

Have you downloaded the free Self-Care Guide for Perfectionist? Click here to access it:
martinafink.lpages.co/perfectionist-bundle

EPISODE RESOURCES

Download your free Success Guide for Perfectionists
Learn more about Perfectionist Rehab

CONNECT WITH CATHERINE

https://www.instagram.com/catherinesbarebeauty/

https://www.instagram.com/curlywurlycath/

Thank you so much for listening to this episode! I'd love to hear your thoughts in the comments below! If you can think of anyone in your life who could benefit from this episode, please share it with them right now! <3

TODAY’S EPISODE TRANSCRIBED:

Martina Fink 0:00

This is episode number 131 with Catherine Lewis. Welcome to the Glow Life podcast. The one and only place for ambitious, high achieving and perfectionist women like you who want to leave, overwhelm behind. Turn self doubt into self confidence. And learn to trust yourself again, so that you can work less fully love and accept yourself and live a fulfilled and glowing life. Every week, I'll be giving you tips and inspiration on how to think less, feel more slow down can use your body and your daily habits to help you step up, level up and glow up in all areas of your life. This is not just about the big shifts, you can glow just a little more every single day.

Welcome back to the Glow Life podcast, season number two with the second episode of season two, so grateful to have you here. And today we have a special guest on the podcast. Catherine Lewis is someone who has been following me for just a couple of months. And she joined one of my 2021 Visions workshop earlier this year, we haven't really worked together outside of that. And she is here today for an on air coaching session, which means going to dive into her struggles and figure out what she can do to feel better and release some of the perfectionism and overwhelm and stress that she's experiencing on a daily basis. Before we dive in, I wanted to talk to you about stress and overwhelm. And the things that are making our lives so difficult. The thing is that we have a choice, I was recently talking to one of my clients and she said, "You know Martina, after taking your program, nothing has really changed in the outside. It's only the approach that I have to my work and to my schedule and to my work life balance that has changed." And that's really the key here. Releasing perfectionism is not about quitting your job and traveling the world and selling all your belongings it can be but really what it is, is you establishing a healthier relationship with yourself, with your habits with your time and your schedule, with how you handle your emotions, how you effectively manage stress, and also find ways to not even get into situations that stress you eliminate the stress, right. And so when it comes to effectively managing stress and quitting overwhelm, this is inner work. This is what you need to do on yourself doesn't mean that your outside circumstances need to change they can but they don't have to. And you can still create a lasting transformation for yourself. Now we are doing a free training in my community that is starting on Monday, April 5, where you will learn how to effectively manage stress, how to handle and quit your overwhelm and create a healthy work life balance without quitting your job without compromising your results at work. And without letting anyone down along the way. The link to sign up for free is in the show notes. And you know as someone who probably is experiencing all the things I am pretty sure you're not alone. I loved complaining about the stress that I was experiencing in the past to my friends who were also experiencing stress. So if you know anyone who needs this training as well and who could join you live on these three days, please invite them with you and hold each other accountable for showing up for the training to share the link with them. It is in the show notes and I would love to see you there. Now let's bring on Catherine Lewis. She has struggled with her weight with PCOS and hormonal issues over the years and she has extremely high expectations of herself since she was a teenager and never really has time for herself because she's either working there for her husband, for her friends and family which has hugely impacted her mental health and her stress levels. In today's on air coaching episode I'm coaching Catherine through how to lower the expectations you have of yourself that make you feel fuzzy in your head what to prepare and not to get overwhelmed when you have to go back to work after a long time in isolation and working from home. What happens when you're too flexible and too giving all the time. Hint it's not good for you. A powerful heart emotion exercise that I'm taking her through to figure out why she's stuck with herself care how to prioritize yourself when you want to be the best in everything, how to set better boundaries with yourself, and the number one and super simple thing Catherine needs to do now to decrease the overwhelm of life responsibilities, and so much more. And you can find everything we talked about today in the show notes at martinafink.com/podcast/131. Welcome, Catherine. I'm so grateful and happy to have you on the podcast today.

Catherine Lewis 5:35

Me too. And forward to have a packed in there. Yeah, just getting to know me and you.

Martina Fink 5:42

So this is an on air coaching session. So basically, we're going to I'm going to guide you through some of your blocks and your challenges, to see what is standing in the way of you living your very own glow life. And where is also perfectionism and procrastination, high expectations? Where are these things standing in your way? So thank you for coming on and for sharing bits and pieces about your life with us. So I would love to know from you first, what is your biggest challenge at the moment when it comes to perfectionism and you not being able to live the best life that you could.

Catherine Lewis 6:21

Try and be the best at everything. I like to be like the top of the game on everything I do. But I sometimes find the right one locked in one goal.

Martina Fink 6:31

So you find you set high expectations of yourself.

Catherine Lewis 6:36

Yes, yeah. So like anything I do have really high expectations. I've got to be the top of the game in that in that field or session and during that time as well.

Martina Fink 6:47

Interesting. You want to be the best in everything. Does that relate to work? Does that to relate to your relationships, your health, or or all of it?

Catherine Lewis 6:58

All of it. But the place that I let down most is doing things for myself.

Martina Fink 7:02

Yes.

Catherine Lewis 7:03

I just I seem to procrastinate. Look around, just go around in circles. And avoid the thing that I need to do that I know this best for me.

Martina Fink 7:13

Interesting. So would you say that? What else? What is getting in the way? Like, why don't you have time for you? What are you spending your time on?

Catherine Lewis 7:19

Work. Learning new skills. Learning new courses , helping my husband, everything apart from me. Yeah, even the dog down to the dog. He goes first. Friends, friends are first families first. Yeah, just everybody. And I've noticed that in the last few years. It's just, I need to do more for me. And I've recently become a fully qualified reflexologist. In that path, I'm getting to know more than more about what I want to know I want to do.

Martina Fink 7:55

Interesting, interesting. Okay, so I feel like there are two things. One is the high expectations you have of yourself always wanting to be the best in everything. And then the other thing is that you're really people pleasing and putting everything else first including your dog. Because I mean, if you don't take care of your dog, it's going to like pee in your house, it's going to bite you because it doesn't get food right there is like instant constant consequences if you don't take care of that. But if you don't take care of yourself, it's not that drastic, usually. Right?

Catherine Lewis 8:28

Yeah. until it gets to the point when it is yes. Mental health is, you know, a big thing that just gets on top of that person and gets consumed by everything. And it just becomes a big fog. Yeah.

Martina Fink 8:42

And how would you say it sounds like you're still in this space, right? Where you're trying to figure out how can I take better care of myself? And how can I make more time for me? So how does it feel to be in this space, where you're at right now?

Catherine Lewis 8:57

jittery, walk slowly. But I know if anything is going to work, it's going to take time and weird feelings to come through for it to feel right in the end. So I've learned, like, if you're just trying things, even if they don't work, then you can always say I that's not for me. I'll try the next thing. That's my path. At the moment. I'm trying everything.

Martina Fink 9:18

What have you tried so far?

Catherine Lewis 9:20

I do a lot of meditation I wish I never used to do and I do I am qualified everyone and read it. So I'm trying to do that more myself. But then I just find other things that get in the way. So that's a goal of mine to do is just to do that more journaling. I'm trying my best to do it. But sometimes I feel like I just can't put our pen to paper. And like I'm really really bad at setting goals myself, like really bad and like detecting the ball on his hand doesn't actually do when the goal.

Martina Fink 9:53

Interesting, okay. There's a lot of things. It sounds like you're really willing to try but nothing is really sticking To the point where you feel comfortable about it, and it's become your routine, just how, you know, you brush your teeth every day and you take showers regularly, it's not really sticking. So I would like to go back a little to the beginning of our conversation where you shared that you want to be the best in everything, which I completely resonate with. I didn't have so much of a competitive thing with others. I just had that with myself. Is it the same for you?

Catherine Lewis 10:29

Yeah, like it doesn't bother me about to like, obviously, the teams have gone to that my satisfy me to do 20 about more.

Martina Fink 10:36

Right? You're really just want to be the best of yourself, like you want to bring 150% to the table. Why do you think you do that?

Catherine Lewis 10:46

Probably all started when I was a teenager, to be honest, telomeres aren't TV ads were everywhere. So I was on for a month at a time at that age. And then I'd be off for a few months. So hormone hormonal issues constantly. And eventually, then when I was 24, finding out I had polycystic ovaries. And, and I've always been the healthy one of everyone I know. And I do everything in my power to look after myself. And as of September last year, I know pretty much Reagan as well. So plant based life, which is not for everyone. But for me it my body seems to like it

Martina Fink 11:28

Beautiful.

Catherine Lewis 11:30

And recently about specialist appointments regarding the waist and stuff as well, because I can't physically do anymore. So I've just been told that I pre diabetic, so I was like, Well, what do you suppose I do, then you can seem to help. So this is I found out throughout my life, I've got to do everything myself become the best in that field, whether it's making the nicest, I don't know, vegan pasta meal, or our personal and gluten free, my husband's about celiac. So that's another thing as well. So I'm always the one that's learning. So I've just found if I learn, I become good, but I just get a bit confused as I can just leave it as one thing. Just bear with me that one thing for a moment, I just have to do the next thing then. So that's where I think it comes from.

Martina Fink 12:22

Yeah, so really all about not feeling great in your body and having all these issues where you felt out of control and you trying to learn almost got you to a place where you are feeling in control again, would that resonate?

Catherine Lewis 12:36

Yeah, and it's just when I am in control, which I was probably for the pandemic, but new things came came to the surface that and rich knocked me off balance again. So learning to be on my own, which I'm not used to. I'm a social person. I'm an extrovert. And I've just had this massive introvert which doesn't agree with me. Yeah, so like this whole year have been mapped NASA just that's what's making me learn more about me, because I'm with me all the time. That's what I think I need to learn on next is learning to live with myself, learning what my body needs listening to it, we've all got this gut feeling, but we never go in it so

Martina Fink 13:17

interesting. And you're certainly not the only one going through these challenges at the moment. You know, in the past year of isolation, whether you're an introvert or an extrovert, I'm an introvert and I love being by myself, but it was still challenging, because we are not supposed to have any contact relief, or as little as possible. And that is challenging for for any human being because we're supposed to be we're social beings, right? So it's very challenging. And certainly when you're on your own need to figure out who am I really and then all this stuff comes up. And you know, like you said, being with yourself is something that we don't really learn especially in today's day and age with like social media, like every single moment, we are free and we're not doing anything, we take the phone and scroll or go on Netflix or Instagram and Facebook and Twitter and all these things right to distract ourselves. So we don't even know what it's truly like to be by yourself. So now that you have more, let's say quote unquote, time to be by yourself in this past year. Why do you think when you try a new self care practice, such as meditation or journaling or doing the Reiki on yourself all these things? Why do you think it's not sticking?

Catherine Lewis 14:32

Really like I know my head first fancy bus. Every time I do it, there's a mental block or like a fog hanging around. And still, obviously I've got a husband I'm not totally on my own. I see him again, cuz he works currently stem, but he's quite. He is a total introvert. I'm pretty negative, selfish human being but I'm not in a nasty way. But I just need to find a way to like Block, everyone's energy is off and it's just such an empath it just doesn't happen. So for me that I can't find the answer for that, I don't know why I still don't know why I can't change why I can to try and buy things and stick in.

Martina Fink 15:15

Which one of these did you actually? Or do you actually enjoyed the most when you do the amas it Reiki meditation, journaling, setting goals for yourself Anything else?

Catherine Lewis 15:24

meditation probably is my favorite.

Martina Fink 15:27

Okay. So how do you feel when you meditate?

Catherine Lewis 15:31

When I'm actually in the zone, my heart gets away. I feel focused. If I get rid of somebody else, so then I'm totally creative. So she also said that with meditation, totally pans and not before bed, probably first thing in the morning, is probably the best time for me. And I just need to make it a habit that happens every day, at least 10 minutes by just less. Right. It's hard to get back into it. Yeah, I think recently, it's because I'm not in work with my full time job. And I've got a fear of going back to work. I'm thinking how am I going to live this like happy life? as well as go back to work?

Martina Fink 16:11

Yeah, that's so interesting. You're not even going back to work yet. But you already have this stories in your mind? Oh, no, I have to go back to work. How will I be able to live that lifestyle when I go back to work, but until then you're not even living it? Because you're so afraid and so consumed by your thoughts, right? And I totally understand that. And there's a lot of self sabotage happening here, which is absolutely normal. Because it's like that fear of what if I actually am happier? What if things actually are glowing everyday, you know, and I can combine meditation and Reiki and my job and my family and everything together? That's so scary, because you've never had this life before. So what happens is that you are, we have this comfort zone, which is where you're in right now. And then as soon as you want to create a new habit, and you have it is always outside of your comfort zone. So starting a meditation practice outside of your comfort zone, you start a few times, what happens then is that there's this rubber band that pulls you back into your comfort zone, because it's scary out there. Right? You don't know what your life will be like, if you actually meditate every day, you might be calm and focused every day. And how will that affect your relationship? How will that affect the quality of your work? And that's scary.

Catherine Lewis 17:30

Yeah, yeah, it is scary. Like if my husband said, I've noticed a massive change in it or like, Oh, thank God, or is that bad news? I don't know. Because it's totally different times to. So that's even that's a bit like, not wobbly. But like, it's just new. We've been together for 17 years, since we were 15. That's a long time for us both to change and develop. And he's always been the one to change and develop, might take a backseat until last year. So yeah, he's like, I don't know what this person said. This is actually me. This is what I've always wanted to be doing a follow me. I don't care if you don't like it, but it's tough man.

Martina Fink 18:12

Yeah, I love that. So what is so scary for you about feeling calm and focused every day?

Catherine Lewis 18:19

It's not the fear of the artist, the fear of keeping that?

Martina Fink 18:22

What will happen then if you keep in? It's just the fear of the unknown.

Catherine Lewis 18:26

I think it's just, I don't know why I always focus on the band, rather than the now. But I tend to do that quite a lot.

Martina Fink 18:36

Yeah. And it's normal, because you don't know. We all don't know what uncertainty will be like, right? Nobody knows what's happening tomorrow. And we're so used to that because it's everyday life, we don't do much. But when there's something new or something good happening, we were not used to how that would feel. So let's just let's paint a picture. Close your eyes for a moment. And imagine you're really doing this meditation, you get up in the morning, and you take some time for yourself, even if it's as little as 10 minutes. You meditate, you get comfortable, maybe you light a candle, you feel really good. You meditate for a couple minutes. And then as you come out of your meditation, you feel really calm and focused and clear in your head and really connected to your heart. You start your day. And now you imagine that you do this every day, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, every day of the week. You continue to do this for weeks and months. Is there any sensation in your physical body that's coming up for you right now?

Catherine Lewis 19:51

Emotional.

Martina Fink 20:00

If you had to pinpoint a specific place in body where you are feeling these emotions, where where is that?

Catherine Lewis 20:07

In my heart center.

Martina Fink 20:12

Can you describe it? Can you see a color or a texture or temperature or

Catherine Lewis 20:18

It's all reflected in between green, green and pink. And then slightly black. Posted being softer vibes and then like a pool, a puddle of water, like swimming, but it's not coming down. It's just forecaster

Martina Fink 20:37

What do you feel like is happening in your heart space right now?

Catherine Lewis 20:41

I just feels caged caged like

Martina Fink 20:48

What is it that would like to come out?

Catherine Lewis 20:51

accordion section, but it just never happens. To me to give you a more like a feeling and background. Just Just take me into like, just pulling me back in into this like, swirl?

Martina Fink 21:09

Does it feel like tumultuous like a heavy energy or is it more

Catherine Lewis 21:15

slow? Rather than being pushed down as being pushed down? Sort of wait? Yes. For my feet?

Martina Fink 21:24

And are you trying to resist it?

Catherine Lewis 21:27

Sometimes, right now? No. Sometimes it does. And sometimes it doesn't.

Martina Fink 21:34

What do you feel is pulling you down? The people around you?

Catherine Lewis 21:38

Just everyone just doesn't understand me.

Martina Fink 21:44

So do you feel like this? What is the thing that feels caged in your heart? We go back to that what is the thing that would love to come out but cannot

Catherine Lewis 21:54

just set just me living my life journey and having my boundaries because I've always been really flexible. My life too flexible. Can you to set clear boundaries for everyone around me like feeling down to even I know you don't like my own time sometimes. But even down to setting times for my own staff to be on my own talk to me. Because I know that's challenging for me. Sometimes I know it's worth it after I've done like a little workout. Yeah,

Martina Fink 22:30

can you place your hand on your heart for a moment. And just breathe into that space and the color of the heart chakra is pink and green. You can pick whichever color feels more peaceful and more loving to you and just kind of expand as like in your heart space with every breath. You can clear out the darkness clear out the fast pulsating energy and just calm that down. With a couple of breaths.

Your thoughts wander just come back to beautiful pink or green color in your heart space.

When you feel ready, you can slowly come back and open your eyes.

Catherine Lewis 23:54

Feels good. Yeah,

Martina Fink 23:56

I can see this smile on your face. So pretty

Catherine Lewis 23:59

are starting to get into it myself. I don't need to put these banners that like for myself, I need to set them on a healthy lifestyle. So customers and people are gonna have to understand.

Martina Fink 24:14

Yeah.

Yeah.

And it sounds like you know, you being feeling like you're in this cage is because you don't set the boundaries how big your cage is really right. So other people just cross your boundaries and step on you until you're actually so caged in your own heart. And that version of you that feels confident and glowing and healthy and full of energy wants to come out but it cannot because there's so many people kind of defining what your boundaries are because you don't have them. They're just, you know, flexible. So it sounds like more than anything. You need boundaries with yourself around like you said. Having a strict schedule that you stick to, and that is the boundary that you need to respect yourself, between work and family and everything and yourself. So if you had to set one boundary or schedule one thing in your calendar, what would that first step be?

Catherine Lewis 25:18

Well, I'm going back to work probably Monday to Wednesday. And starting at 10, and finishing at 6am, not doing 99.

Martina Fink 25:30

Can you kind of decide that yourself?

Catherine Lewis 25:33

Yeah, cuz I'm in college.

Martina Fink 25:35

Oh, awesome.

Catherine Lewis 25:36

But that makes it harder sometimes to set these boundaries.

Martina Fink 25:39

I know. Let me tell you, I know.

Catherine Lewis 25:42

I'm gonna have to do. I've been self employed since 2014. And I've been flexible, and everyone knows that. But that's my fear of making people unhappy. But I'm making myself unhappy by listening, topia.

Martina Fink 25:57

Yeah, and I resonate with this so much, because when I started my business in 2015, I was still doing much like makeup workshops and beauty workshops and stuff like that. And I was my calendar was open Monday to Sunday, like people could book workshops with me on Sunday, Saturday night, I didn't care like I would always make myself available. And guess what, the moment I decided, I'm only going to do certain days.

That's, you know, that's what people adjust it to. They're like, Okay, let me check. And we will always find a solution. So, it is so funny how we believe that when we set boundaries, others are going to reject us or not like us anymore. But actually, they're just going to take the information and find a way around, because they will still want to work with you, you know. So it's going to be so much easier than you think I promise if you just step up for yourself. So it feels like as we get off this call, what is your next thing you're going to do? Like? Do you have to schedule in some boundaries in your calendar? Like do you need to schedule in time for you? Do you need to schedule the time that you work? Do you need to block out certain days? Like what exactly is your number one step that you're going to take tonight?

Catherine Lewis 27:13

And so the next one's probably going to be like mealtime and bedtime, because my husband does shifts I try and get time with him. And but for me, eating late is not the happiest, nobody likes so I guess start eating before him. And then bedtime for me is 10 o'clock the desk?

Martina Fink 27:33

Are you going to bed later at the moment?

Catherine Lewis 27:36

Yes. plus one. Yeah, sometimes not sleeping at all attended to insomnia. So yeah, so definitely 10 o'clock. And then whenever my body allows me to recap, because going back to work, I hopefully I'll be starting around 10 or 11 o'clock. So I can get my exercise and my rocking, but I do daily in meditation.

Martina Fink 28:04

Sounds amazing. I really want you to set yourself up for success. Right. So sometimes we want to create new habits, such as Oh, I'm gonna meditate for 30 minutes every day and when you haven't meditated at all. So we want to make sure that the boundaries you set or actually realistic for you, so that you will in 90% of the cases you'll be able to follow through. So for my example, last year in isolation, I used to go to bed really, really late at like, one 130, because I'm really productive at night. And I decided I don't want to do that anymore. And I started setting an alarm at 1030 to like, go get ready for bed by 11, right. And going from like 130 to 1030 or 11 is too big of a difference for me to actually be able to do that. So what I decided is to go to bed before midnight, and that has worked really well now that I've back to 1130, I can go back to 11. And you want to make sure that it is actually realistic, the goal that you set for yourself because otherwise, you're just going to set yourself up for failure. You'll do it once or twice like this anyway. And you'll go back to 130 or what I feel like shooting for 10pm is a realistic goal for you.

Catherine Lewis 29:22

Not straightaway nor in probably be more like, because it's child robot one. So probably more like less than 30 to start off with 11 or 1130. And that's

Martina Fink 29:34

good, because that's the thing like we always were very, you know, flexible with our goals, like when you are flexible with your goal, how can you actually then achieve it? So 11 go to bed. Do you need to do anything or talk to anyone about this to make sure that you are being held accountable and that you actually follow through?

Catherine Lewis 29:56

I've got beautiful husband because he won't be here sometimes. Yes, it'll be You know, come in be quite left, because I'm a light sleeper, but you can watch Telly and stuff. But just on that note, I will be telling my friends like everybody around me, if you are going to contact me mccollins can be offended, which means that I am on a bed at 11.

Martina Fink 30:15

Yes, nobody call you or text you later.

Catherine Lewis 30:18

No, no customers nobody.

Martina Fink 30:21

Beautiful, beautiful. Does that feel like a good boundary for you?

Catherine Lewis 30:25

Yeah.

Martina Fink 30:27

Amazing. Well done. So interesting how I think we got to the root cause of why you're not sticking to your habits. It's because you're not creating the space to actually do that.

Catherine Lewis 30:44

Like, it's like a puppy is that if you'd like medical free from a young age is always when you're free?

Martina Fink 30:49

Yeah.

Catherine Lewis 30:50

So I need to learn for a puppy.

Martina Fink 30:54

Yes, and you have a dog. So you know, you know how that works.

Catherine Lewis 30:57

I give him both days. So I need to do.

Martina Fink 30:59

Exactly. And it's so hard because habits are so their habits. So we're used to them and changing them are so difficult. Sometimes, I don't want to say it's difficult because it just really takes dedication into decision. But it takes a certain amount of days or you know, time to stick to it. There are studies that say 21 days, there's studies that say 60 days. So whatever works for you, I can't really say what how it really is. But I know that from doing something once or twice, it's not going to stick. But you really need to understand why it hasn't worked. And for you understanding that it is because you're not you're too flexible with everyone else and with yourself. And with your own schedule like that is going to change everything because now you are aware of what the reason is why it hasn't worked in the past.

Catherine Lewis 31:52

And it's just stick into that. And being firm, with myself even when it goes back to seeing people and I never normally like Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, new work day. Yes, put a patch up with anybody. On those days.

Martina Fink 32:08

Exactly how I do it to me works really well.

Catherine Lewis 32:11

Just because I can't split this up into six people.

Martina Fink 32:15

Yeah, you totally can't. Beautiful, I'm really excited for you to set up these boundaries and your calendar and your reminders and talk to the people around you so that they know. And please also ask them to lovingly hold you accountable. I'm doing that also with my friends. When I want to start something new, it's really helpful to have them call you out when you're not sticking to your boundaries and and get their support if needed. Beautiful. Thank you so much for going there with me and for being so vulnerable and honest and you know, open to exploring this together. If anyone wants to connect with you, what are ways for people to find you.

Catherine Lewis 32:58

So I have a personal and a business. So different things for everybody. Well, being inside is at Catherine's Barbie do. And personal side is particularly when you have Facebook and Instagram.

Martina Fink 33:13

Beautiful. Anything else?

Catherine Lewis 33:15

No, just come say hi, if you want to if you're struggling as well, I can hold you accountable.

Martina Fink 33:21

Oh, yes, I remember you joined one of the workshops earlier this year and you really loved the account. So if anybody needs accountability, with boundaries in the schedule, going to bed at a certain time, reach out to calf and connect with her so that you guys can keep each other accountable. I love that.

Catherine Lewis 33:42

It was good.

Martina Fink 33:43

Yes, yes. glow girl community. Beautiful. Thank you so much. And I loved having you on here.

Catherine Lewis 33:49

Thank you for being and having me on.

Martina Fink 33:53

Yes. So glad to have you my community. I am so grateful for Catherine, that she has been in my online community of wonderful women from around the world and they've been able to support her through the session for better boundaries with herself. If you are someone who is struggling with overwhelm, control stress, low self worth, and you're constantly over giving to everyone else and find yourself depleted just like Katherine then head to the link in the show notes to grab our free self care guide for perfectionists or join us and perfectionist a rehab which is a 90 day healing journey out of overwhelm into a fulfilled and glowing life where you have a super beautiful work life balance. To learn more about perfectionist rehab, you can go to martinafink.com/rehab if you enjoyed this episode and it has inspired you to take at least one step forward in your very own glow life. It would mean so much to me if you left us a review on iTunes. Follow the glow Live podcast on iTunes and Spotify and for everything that we mentioned in today's episode, you can go check out the show notes at martinafink.com/podcast/131. If there's anybody in your life that you love that needs to hear this episode and has struggles with boundaries, please forward it to them right now. I would love to connect with you on social media you can find me at Martina glows on Instagram and Facebook. Thank you for being here today and for really caring for yourself so deeply that you've taken the time to listen to this podcast episode. What you do for yourself is going to impact every single soul that you touch in your life. You deserve to feel glowing and confident. Beautiful


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DISCLAIMER

All material in this episode is provided for your information only and may not be construed as medical advice or instruction. No action or inaction should be taken based solely on the contents of this podcast episode. Instead, readers should consult appropriate health professionals on any matter relating to their health and well-being.

The information and opinions expressed here are believed to be accurate, based on the best judgement available to the speakers, and readers and listeners who fail to consult with appropriate health authorities assume the risk of any injuries. In addition, the information and opinions expressed here do not necessarily reflect the views of every contributor. The Company acknowledges occasional differences in opinion and welcomes the exchange of different viewpoints.

#130 Perfectionists! Stop Controlling Your Entire Life with Apryl Franchini

 
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Perfectionists love controlling... Controlling workouts, what you eat, how you move your body, how many tasks you got done in a day. Perfectionists also like to overthink and often have a very strong inner voice that tends to be extremely mean and loud.

Today, I am speaking to my wonderful client, Apryl Franchini, who has been able to fully release control and perfection in her life and learned to shift from her overthinking mind into her beautiful heart.

Apryl is, just like myself, a certified Holistic Health Coach (IIN) and she specializes in food freedom and body love. She helps women ditch the scale and eat with zero guilt. Apryl recently moved to Bali and is currently living her very own version of the glow life in paradise.

IN TODAY’S EPISODE, WE TALK ABOUT

  • How she got from feeling confused, lost, overly controlling to becoming her own best friend

  • How she ditched her Apple watch and learned to listen to her body's needs

  • Why she was still perfectionizing her eating disorder and basically cheated on herself

  • How she stopped overthinking everything and started trusting her heart

  • What it truly means to be kind to yourself

And so much more! 

Have you downloaded the free Self-Care Guide for Perfectionist? Click here to access it:
martinafink.lpages.co/perfectionist-bundle

EPISODE RESOURCES

Download your free Success Guide for Perfectionists
Become a Holistic Health Coach with IIN
Learn more about Perfectionist Rehab

CONNECT WITH APRIL

aprylfranchini.com
instagram.com/aprylfranchini
More than Body Podcast

Thank you so much for listening to this episode! I'd love to hear your thoughts in the comments below! If you can think of anyone in your life who could benefit from this episode, please share it with them right now! <3

TODAY’S EPISODE TRANSCRIBED:

Martina Fink 0:00

This is episode number 130 with April Franchini Welcome to the Glow Life podcast. The one and only place for ambitious, high achieving and perfectionist women like you who want to leave, overwhelm behind. Turn self doubt into self confidence. And learn to trust yourself again, so that you can work less fully love and accept yourself and live a fulfilled and glowing life. Every week, I'll be giving you tips and inspiration on how to think less, feel more slow down, you can use your body and your daily habits to help you step up, level up and glow up in all areas of your life. This is not just about the big shifts, you can glow just a little more every single day.

Welcome to season two of the Glow Life podcast. So grateful that you are here again after a short break that was so needed over here. And that's one of the first things I actually want to share with you, that I have learned about myself through working through my own perfectionism over the last few years, I would say, I have learned that when something doesn't feel good, we need to change it. We don't need to just push through and pretend we have it all together when really we don't. And that's how I was feeling about the podcast, it became the thing that felt so huge and it felt overwhelming. And I started procrastinating, recording the episodes and getting everything ready on time for my team to upload it so that it can go out to you on time based on a schedule that we had for this. And I started noticing that as soon as I start procrastinating something, there is something that has to change, it is time to listen, when I'm not in flow, I need to get back in flow. And sometimes that means that we need to take a break and do things differently. So I want to give you a really gentle and loving reminder that it is completely safe for you to take a break from whatever you need a break from, it is completely safe for you to do things differently than everybody else would do. And, really whatever you want, you get to trust yourself and to get you get to trust that feeling that is telling you when something is out of alignment, no hard feelings. All that matters is that you do what is right for you.

So my Glow Tip of the Week of this very first episode of season two is that I am giving you permission to listen to yourself. And to leave perfectionism behind for a bit. I don't want you to feel stressed and overwhelmed, or that you're not enough or that you can't get anything done. None of this is serving you. When we feel that we are blocked and we're not in flow. We're not creative. We're not moving forward in our lives. It's time to take a break. And you got to listen to yourself. One of the things that I often do when I am in a situation like this, I asked myself what would love do. In that case, love told me to take a break from the podcast, recharge, get new ideas together, and then start fresh.

Welcome to season two, which is going to be very different from what you have listened to in the past season. From the beginning of this podcast, we are going to bring on more clients to the show because I want you to see the transformations that are truly possible for you when you start to embrace wherever you are right now and give yourself the opportunity to change. Love yourself enough to make a difference and do some work on yourself to release perfectionism. And you get to say, No, I don't want to continue on this overwhelm and stress from my everyday life. So I'm bringing on some of my beautiful clients and I cannot wait to share all of this with you because they're just such wonderful human beings and I want to share their spark with you. I'm also going to be doing some on air coaching on these episodes, which means that someone will come on to the show live and we will do a coaching session together and those are all people that have never worked with me. I don't know what their struggles are before. We get on the call, I just know that they're struggling with perfectionism and overwhelm. And then we get to see what we can explore in a short coaching session, and you get to witness the transformation that someone can go through live on the podcast, I'm really, really excited about this.

If you are someone who would love to do that, and be coached on air on this podcast, you can drop us an email to info@martinafink.com. And let us know, we would love to feature you.

And last but not least, we are also bringing on some special experts in guest interviews, and all of them are going to be in alignment with perfectionism, overwhelm stress, learning to feel that you love yourself and to give yourself the feeling that you are enough. And I'm just really excited to bring all of these different things together to help you on your very own journey to your own glowing life. In the meantime, I also created a new free resource for you if you are a perfectionist and you're struggling with overworking yourself and you have zero work life balance, you only have a work work balance. Basically, I created a free Self Care Guide for perfectionists where I'm sharing three tips for high achievers who are ready to remove, overwhelm and worthless without compromising your results. And without burning yourself out. You will get these tips when you sign up in the link in the show notes and it is completely free. We'd love for you to get a hold of this free guide so that you as a perfectionist can start taking better care of yourself and no, I'm not going to tell you to do face masks. This is a deeper guide.

And now let's get started with the beautiful Apryl Franchini who I had the pleasure to work with last year we started working together at the beginning of the pandemic and she's been through a couple of my programs. She is also a holistic health coach from IIN just like myself, and she specializes in food freedom and body love. She helps women who are struggling or healing from an eating disorder to ditch the scale and eat with zero guilt. And she also has a podcast that is called More Than Body podcast. April just recently moved to Bali in the middle of a pandemic and she is living her very own glow life there. In today's episode, we talk about how she got from feeling confused, lost, overly controlling to becoming her own best friend. How she ditched her Apple Watch and learned to listen to her body's needs. While she was still perfectionizing her eating disorder and basically cheated on herself, how she stopped overthinking everything and started trusting her heart and what it truly means to be kind to yourself and so much more. And you can find everything we talked about today in the show notes at MartinaFink.com/podcast/130.

Welcome, Apryl, I am so excited to have you on the Glow Life podcast today to share a little bit more about your own journey of creating your own glowing life

Apryl Franchini 8:36

I am so excited to be here you have no idea.

Martina Fink 8:41

And you're coming live from Bali, which is so exciting. You have yes to escape the craziness in Switzerland and you're finding yourself in Bali. I'm sure we're gonna dive into that. But really, I want to just take a moment to acknowledge how far you have come in the past six to 12 months, I remember you signed up for one of my mini courses really a couple I would say probably like March or April last year just at the beginning of the pandemic. And since then we've been doing a lot of work together and you know, just really helped you get your mindset in the right place and helped you uplevel yourself love and work through like procrastination and perfectionism and all those things that always get in the way. And so before we go into like how amazing your life is today, I would like for you to take us a little back to where you were about a year ago right at the beginning of the pandemic and how you were feeling back then. What did your life look like a year ago?

Apryl Franchini 9:44

So at the beginning of COVID actually feel like that didn't really hit me because I had just come back from a holiday. So was feeling okay and I actually didn't have any plans for this summer. And usually I have plans for the summer already at the end of the previous summer, you know. So I was feeling kind of good because they thought that everything was working out perfectly, because they went on holiday before. And then still, like I didn't really have plans. But with that being said, mentally, I was still struggling a little bit. Yes, I was still in the IIN program, actually, in March. So I was already thinking about building and open my business. But there was a lot of confusion in my head. And I didn't know where to start, I already had an Instagram where I shared different content to be honest. And it didn't feel that aligned, say really felt out of alignment and they felt kind of lost, you know, I wanted to go in one direction. Or my heart wanted to go in one direction. And my mind was telling me to do something else. And I really felt lost. I didn't know what to do. And I knew I wanted to I remember I wanted to explore or learn how to be more in alignment with my purpose, or actually how to know my purpose. And I wanted to learn more about manifestation. And I remember like chakras and yeah, I just wanted to start a spiritual journey, if you know what I'm saying, you know, I was really superficial, a year ago. And this also reflects or you can see that in the content I was sharing a year ago, I was more into fitness. But not that fitness that it's, it's good, you know, like, it's, it's okay to have like, fitness content. It's beautiful. It's still beautiful.

But what I was really doing, like I said, it wasn't in alignment, so I didn't feel like it was like really helping somebody. It was more a way for me to keep being in my disorder eating without feeling like I was in my disordered eating, if you know what I'm saying. I was still feeling good. Absolutely. Because I've been through a lot when it comes to my eating disorder. So I was definitely feeling good 100% But still, there was this little part of me that was pushing myself to the gym every day and counting how many calories I burned during the workout. And yeah, controlling my not really my weight but simply the way I looked in the mirror and how my clothes were fitting me and everything. So yeah, I just felt really not happy anymore with with myself and I felt like I wanted to change and I don't know if you remember but I remembered that we worked a lot on something counting calories on my on my Apple Watch and moving my body intuitively say remember that with you. I stopped going to the gym for a few months, not only because COVID hit and the gym were closed, but also because I needed a break from the gym. And yeah, it was it was a beautiful journey that one. So yeah, that's a little bit where I was when we first started working together in the group coaching program. Glow Girl Foundations if I'm not wrong, and then I started working with you one on one as well. And that started more for business right.

Martina Fink 13:47

So before we dive into that part because that's when like your transformation starts I really want to kind of talk about some of the pains that you experienced in your life because I know so many people that are listening, experienced the same thing. You know, people who are perfectionist, which I know you are a little bit have this thing that they need to control everything right and for you it was controlling your calories it was controlling that you go to the gym every day it was controlling what you are eating it was controlling that how you fit into your clothes, right and so this control piece is something that is so present for so many people because that's what gives us this feeling of safety like when I can control then I feel safe and I remember you and I having this conversation about getting rid of the Apple Watch right for a while and actually going to the gym without tracking how many calories you burn and, and all of that stuff and actually not going to the gym and still finding a way to feel good and instead of controlling so much finding a way to tune into your body and feel awesome. Your body, what kind of movement Do I need today, because there is nothing wrong with going to the gym at all, if you do it out of love, right, but when you do it from a place of control and fear of like, if I don't go to the gym, I will gain weight. Or if I don't go to the gym, I won't be able to look good in my bikini like all these things, right? Then it comes from this place of fear, where you're forcing yourself. And basically, we wanted to get you to the place where you trust your body. And whatever you do is because it feels good for you. And it's not because of something where you can tick it off the list and say, burn this many calories went to the gym, right?

Apryl Franchini 15:47

Yeah, I, I 100% agree with you. The important thing like there is nothing wrong in going to the gym. Actually, I am going to the gym right now. But it's out of love. So absolutely. The mindset is everything. So what I was struggling the most was like really connect, reconnecting or connecting with, with myself and intuition. I was living my life trying to, I guess, I don't know, feel fulfilled by numbers, if that makes sense. Or feel good, because somebody told me I was being good. So I was more looking for somebody from the external world or something from the external world that would tell me or would actually, yeah, like reminding me, hey, you're good, you're doing something good, you're worth it. Which This is something that you should feel inside, not outside, you know, you're not worth it. Because something had been on the outside, you're worth it, because you're just worth it, you know, from from something from within. So that is exactly what how, how I was feeling. And trying to go back in time. I feel like that was really the reason why I decided to reach out to you and reach out for support. Because it really realized that I wasn't really living my life for me, but more for others.

Martina Fink 17:29

And how did that feel?

Apryl Franchini 17:31

Not fulfilling at all, not in alignment. And I was I remember that one one night, I was actually doing some journaling. And I wasn't really used to it. Yeah, exactly. It was just pretty new. And I was doing journaling, just every now and then. And I remember I was journaling about the fact that I didn't want to live my life like that for the rest of my life. You know, just trying to make others happy, and just trying to appear pretty and worthy. And I don't know, good for others, and not for me. Like, I am important as well. Like I actually am the most important person of my life, you know, and something that you always say I am actually my best friend, you know. So why I was just trying to make others happy and not myself. I was trying to impress others, apparently. And when I realized that I was like, I think I need to change something. Because Yeah, it doesn't it doesn't work like that.

Martina Fink 18:42

Yeah. And that's a big realization where I feel like you're probably everyone listening resonates because we just grow up like that. No, you're you need to please Mom and Dad, you need to please your teachers with good grades and being you know, a well, well behaved child, you need to please your partner and make sure that you do whatever they want and need. And that's just so ingrained in our society that it's really hard to break out of that. And the first step is always to realize it. And you had this realization and your journaling, which is so beautiful, where you're like, you know what, I don't want to continue like this. And that is so great. What would you say was the first step then?

Apryl Franchini 19:26

So looking back now I feel like at that moment when I was writing that, I feel like I didn't even know that there was a realization I just started I was just writing. And I think it hit me a couple days later that maybe this was something that I needed to work on. So I remember I still remember Vedic very clearly how I got to know you. And during those days where I like between me writing those, that thing and Actually realizing that I wanted to have support. I remember that, that I received a memo from IGN. And they were promoting retreats or upcoming events from past students, and you were promoting your retreat here in Bali. And I was like, Oh, that sounds really good. And they feel like I didn't. At that moment, coven wasn't really there, or present like in in Switzerland, or like in Europe in general. So, obviously, you still had your retreat there. And I looked at your profile on Instagram, and I saw you were from Switzerland, I felt so like, Wow, she's from Switzerland as well. This is amazing. I didn't know that. There were like so many other health coaches in Switzerland, because luganda is a very different city or the Italian part of Switzerland is a very different like Cairo, Switzerland. And yeah, I felt like so understood already. I'm saying I just felt super connected with you. So in that moment, it hit me that I wanted to probably, like reach out support from you, because I was looking at your posts and pictures. And I was like, wow, this seems like this seems like the person I really needed in my life, you know. So yeah, that is the first step actually, that I that I took, like, reaching out to you.

Martina Fink 21:37

Oh, so beautiful. And I'm so happy, we were able to, you know, work through all these things together. And it was certainly not always easy, you know, working through these things. And one of the things I remember I also had to teach you is like, reach out when you're struggling, right? You're, you're working with me, so that I can help you. But when you don't tell me that you need help, like, I won't know. And I feel like towards the end of our time together, you were really so used to just saying, you know, Martina I'm struggling with this. Martina, I need help with this, you know, this is going on? Can you help me and I love that so much. Because we often feel guilty to ask for help. And I feel like like seeing you now a year later, as this beautiful, confident woman that has traveled across the planet during COVID completely living your life there and getting clients, you know, from everywhere. It's just so beautiful. And it did start with that first step of realizing I actually need help, or I want help, and then accepting the help and then also asking for it in the process.

Apryl Franchini 22:43

Yeah, absolutely.

Martina Fink 22:45

Let's talk a little bit about what your life looks like now. And obviously, you know, I'm really jealous of your being in Bali, being able to travel, but not everybody might want to travel. But it's not really about you know, you being able to travel and have this freedom. It's really about the feeling that you have today about your life and about yourself that I would love to dive into more. So how would you say you feel about yourself? You mentioned earlier that you're actually your best friend now. So what does that look like?

Apryl Franchini 23:18

Where do I start? It's just so nice in the first place to know that I have my best friend here with me, you know, Everywhere I go, I know that I can count on me. So I'm not afraid of myself or my mind or my heart anymore, which I used to be, especially in my eating disorder. I was very afraid of me in also in the recovery process, because it was always like, oh, but what if the voices inside my head come up again, you know, and now I know that even if something like maybe a voice come comes up in my head. I know how to handle this, you know, and I know how to be kind with myself. I know how to accept these voices in my head sometimes come up, I know how to just to really be compassionate towards myself. And I feel like that is really a list for me what being my best friend means, you know, just knowing that I always have my back and even if I make mistakes, even if I don't finish my to do list for today. I am still a good person. You know I'm still worth it. I'm still I'm still me. It's not Did I am less worthy because I didn't tick off all the things on my to do list or something like that. So yeah, I feel like that is the main thing.

Martina Fink 25:14

I got like full body with goosebumps. So as we were talking, and it's just exactly what you mentioned earlier around, getting the validation from yourself and not from the outside, like your worthiness doesn't depend on how many things you can take off your to do list, but actually how kind you are to yourself and how compassionate you can be. And I feel like seeing you now, after all this work that you've done, I can really feel the shift from your mind. To your heart, you know, in the beginning, you were like I'm feeling lost and confused, and my mind was controlling and I had all these voices in my head, I didn't know where I was going. So there's like a lot of thinking in your brain that almost makes your brain explode at times, right? There's like so much going on. And then over the month of working together, you've been able to bring all of this energy from your head down into your heart space where now you are pined you are compassionate, you feel worthy, like all of those are feelings that we only experience in the heart, right?

Apryl Franchini 26:19

Absolutely. Yeah. Yeah. And I must say, sometimes, I still need to give me a wake up call and tell myself Hey, like, be kind towards yourself, be your own best friend. But I feel like that is part of of the process. Not everything is all like sunshine and rainbows is that how do I say that? I don't remember.

Martina Fink 26:47

rainbows and butterflies, or

Apryl Franchini 26:48

Yes. Yeah. So yeah, I feel like, but it's also nice, because I feel like it. It's exactly on those moments, like the low moments that I realized also how far I've come because they know how to how to handle them, how to nurture myself during those moments as well. And yeah,

Martina Fink 27:11

yeah. And I will say, you know, I go through same things to like I always have, I do have the inner critique, like, those are things that never go away, they will always be there. It's just about how we handle it. And I call this the bounce back time. So how quickly can you shift back into feeling better about yourself? Then you, you know, like, How much time does it actually take you because in the past, when you are in this negative, or, you know, confusing and lost mind, space or mindset, it can take you like a couple of days to get over a crisis, right or over a frustrating situation or moment, like I used to be like that to where I would like, attach to a conflict I had with someone and talk about it for days and spent so much energy into the situation. Whereas now my bounce back time is probably a couple hours. So I just know exactly. I'm frustrated, allowing myself to feel moving through the process, do what I need to do take care of myself, take a break, cancel things, you know, you all know all the things you need, so that you can feel better as quickly as possible. So it's not that we're ignoring all the difficulties. It's not that we don't get them. But we just know how to bounce back so much quicker, because we know ourselves like is that we are our own best friend. So we always know how to help our best friend, right?

Apryl Franchini 28:35

Yes, absolutely. Yeah. And I feel like, of course, we are humans. So we go through this low moments or down moments. And that's completely fine, actually. And they and I remember, like, usually I remind myself this a lot, but it's because of the low moments that we can actually have the high moments, you know,

Martina Fink 29:01

yeah, life is not an even like the Glow Life is not about being happy all the time. It's about getting to know yourself feeling the really high highs. And then when you're feeling low, just knowing that you can treat yourself with kindness and that better times will come again like that's that's absolutely normal. What is what would you say is the number one habit that has that you've been able to create that has truly helped you reconnect or connect or establish that relationship with your own best friend?

Apryl Franchini 29:31

Probably journaling and meditation. Yeah, definitely. I used to journal a little bit and do some meditations. But since I've worked with you, I am very consistent with those and that can feel the difference.

Martina Fink 29:51

Yeah, it's it's a space to have a conversation, specifically journaling, like you actually take the time to write whether it's to you yourself or about yourself, you know, you have this conversation in writing. And it's not just all the crazy thoughts in your mind. So I love that. It's a very consistent practice for me as well, where I just write out some thoughts without expectations without results. It's just about taking the moment to have an actual conversation with myself and check in with how am I feeling right now. So that's really beautiful. And then meditation really helps to just also feel into your heart and what are emotions that are currently present?

Apryl Franchini 30:33

Yeah, absolutely. You know, when I'm journaling, it's really nice, because the, all the you know, I overthink a lot. Notice. So when I am overthinking the situation, or just things in general, putting them on paper, like actually like with my hands and energy, putting them away from my body, helps me a lot.

Martina Fink 31:03

That's why it's so powerful. For example, when you can't sleep, because you're thinking about tomorrow's to do list and all the ideas you have you write it down, it's parked on the piece of paper, you don't need to worry about it. So that's so beautiful. What would you say is the number one thing you learned about yourself in the past year,

Apryl Franchini 31:23

I learned a lot when it comes to, especially moving my body since that was one of the main points that we worked on. And it really do a really deep learn how, what makes me feel happy? and what doesn't make me feel happy, if that makes sense. Like, I also learned where I was lying to myself. Yeah, it's just very difficult one to to answer.

Martina Fink 31:57

Yeah, I mean, you have answered it completely. You know, maybe it's not a number one thing, but there's several things that you have learned about yourself. And that's it. It's really a big thing to realize, where am I actually cheating on myself? Because we're constantly cheating on ourselves. If we're not truly stepping into the kind of life that we desire,

Apryl Franchini 32:20

yeah, yeah.

Martina Fink 32:22

You know, that I'm all about the glow life. So what does living a glowing life mean to you personally, now, Apryl?

Apryl Franchini 32:30

For me, it means really prioritizing myself every day with something that I know makes me feel happy, and loved. And just grateful, grateful for for everything for my life for my body. So it means waking up every day, and knowing that I can really dedicate the morning for myself. And then I know that I can, I have a job that really makes me feel happy, and grateful and fulfilled.

Martina Fink 33:15

And going to cool places in Bali and eating smoothie bowls, from like a tropical cafe.

Apryl Franchini 33:21

Definitely, definitely. But it really, it really means feeling happy and loved in my, in my heart. Just Just that.

Martina Fink 33:32

Yeah. And you don't create that feeling overnight. So, so proud of you for for doing that. And for you know, creating this space for you as well, every single day, because most people don't do that. So this is a big deal.

Apryl Franchini 33:50

Right? Yes, absolutely. And, actually, it's really nice to go back in time and see how far you have come. And you also know that I usually struggle a lot when it comes to celebrating myself, and seeing how far I've come. And I am I'm still working on that. But yeah, it's always nice because in one year, or even in just one month, a lot of can change.

Martina Fink 34:20

So much can change. I remember you coming to the calls, and asking me to dance together because you had something to celebrate, you know, and I'm like, of course I can dance together and celebrate you I love that.

Apryl Franchini 34:33

Yeah, I found it hard and sometimes I still find it hard to celebrate myself. So like knowing that I had somebody to like actually dance with and celebrate myself with feeling like like the better. You know, it doesn't know how to explain but I was like, Yeah, I can celebrate myself if there is somebody else but actually I can also celebrate myself by myself.

Martina Fink 34:58

Yes, just For you, for no reason.

Apryl Franchini 35:02

Absolutely, yes.

Martina Fink 35:05

Tell me what your favorite smoothie is.

Apryl Franchini 35:09

Oh, difficult question. I am obsessed with green smoothie bowls. I just love spirulina inside smoothies, I just love it. So, in every menu, I always choose the green smoothie bowl, with granola on top, and bananas and frozen blueberries, and shredded coconut, and peanut butter on top.

Martina Fink 35:37

So good. What are three things that you are grateful for today?

Apryl Franchini 35:43

I am so grateful for us for being here with you. You just been kind of a long time since we actually haven't like spoken face to face. So it feels amazing to be here again with you. And I am also grateful. Because today I had my day with client calls. And it's always nice to connect with my clients. And I am also grateful for being here. Actually just being here.

Martina Fink 36:14

Hmm. Yeah. So beautiful. Is there anything else you would like to share with our listeners today? Before we talk about like how people can connect with you?

Apryl Franchini 36:24

I reminder that if you are even thinking about changing something in your life, I know it's scary. It's real. Yeah, it's really scary to to change something and to take the first step. But do it really just do it? Because it's worth it. And at the end, you will actually Wish you started before this journey. So just do it.

Martina Fink 36:55

Yeah, do it now. Now's the time. love it so much. So where can people connect with you and potentially work with you if anyone is struggling with eating disorders?

Apryl Franchini 37:05

So I am hanging out most on Instagram and I am a I'm sorry, I am at Apryl Franchini. Yes, April, Franchini. And yes, my name is spelled with a Y instead of an I.

And I also have a website at aprylfranchini.com. And I have a podcast called More Than Body.

Martina Fink 37:33

Beautiful. And we will link all of those in the show notes as well. So anyone listening, please go check out Apryl, this beautiful young woman who has come so far in a year. And you know, I just want to also say that anything that you have achieved and I have achieved in my own life and my own personal transformation is something that anyone can like it's not this is not rocket science, to learn to love yourself and to learn to become your own best friend and be kind to yourself and you know, shift the focus from what everyone else from once from you to the inside. It is really something that any single person on this planet can achieve. So we're not special guys. We are not.

Apryl Franchini 38:21

Yes, we are just humans here. So

Martina Fink 38:26

Thank you so much for coming onto the show today, Apryl and for sharing so openly about your own journey and your struggles and how you know you've been able to transform over the past couple of months. And it's just so beautiful to see how you're thriving now in your in your life and with your clients and how you everything that the kind of work that we've done together, you're now able to pass that on to all your beautiful women in your community. And like that is really how we make change. We don't just make it for ourselves, we make it for the people and for the lives that we touched. So whether that's your clients, your partner, your children, you know, we always it always ripples out. So I'm really proud of you and for the hard work you have done and thank you so much for sharing this with me.

Apryl Franchini 39:13

Of course, thank you for being such a great coach and mentor.

Martina Fink 39:19

I am so grateful to have Apryl in my beautiful community of wonderful clients and to see her efforts and self love that she built over this past year for herself ripple out to all the women that she touches with her work but also outside of work.

If you are someone who is struggling with overwhelm control, self love, low self worth stress, and you have a lot of negative self talk and perfectionism just like Apryl used to head to the link in the show notes to grab your free self care guide for perfectionist or you can also join us and perfectionist rehab which is a 90 day healing journey out of overwhelm into a fulfilled and loving and glowing life. You can find all the details on martinafink.com/rehab. It would mean the world to me if you left us a review for this episode if this was in any way helpful for you and inspires you to live your very own glowing life. Follow the glow Live podcast on iTunes and Spotify and for everything we mentioned in today's episode, you can go check out the show notes at MartinaFink.com/podcast/130. If somebody that you love and truly care about needs to hear this episode, please forward it to them right now. I would so love to connect with you on social media you can find me at Martina glows on Instagram and Facebook. And thank you for being here today and for caring for yourself deeply. What you do for yourself is going to impact every single soul that you touch. So it's all so worth it. And don't forget that you deserve to feel glowing and confident.


WANT MORE? GET YOUR FREE SELF-CARE GUIDE

3 Tips for High Achieving Perfectionists Who Are Ready to Remove Overwhelm and Work Less

...WITHOUT COMPROMISING RESULTS AND BURNING YOURSELF OUT

I created a free self-care guide if you’re someone who always puts everyone else - especially work! - first and needs some tips for perfectionists to slow down again! Click the button below to download your self-care guide for free:


DISCLAIMER

All material in this episode is provided for your information only and may not be construed as medical advice or instruction. No action or inaction should be taken based solely on the contents of this podcast episode. Instead, readers should consult appropriate health professionals on any matter relating to their health and well-being.

The information and opinions expressed here are believed to be accurate, based on the best judgement available to the speakers, and readers and listeners who fail to consult with appropriate health authorities assume the risk of any injuries. In addition, the information and opinions expressed here do not necessarily reflect the views of every contributor. The Company acknowledges occasional differences in opinion and welcomes the exchange of different viewpoints.

#129 Harmonic Health and Healing with Dr. Linda Lancaster

 
 

If you're somebody who skips lunch or eats at your desk, because you're always so busy that you "forget" to eat, this episode has the power to change your life forever. We're talking deep health things today and you will not want to ever go back to the health habits you have now...

Dr. Linda Lancaster is an Energy Medicine physician and the founder of Light Harmonics Institute, an Energy Medicine Clinic and Educational Center. Her training includes Ayurveda, Yoga, subtle energy healing, counseling, nutrition, herbal medicine, detoxification and more. After kicking off her health journey as a yogi and vegetarian chef in the 70's, Linda now guides her family, community, and patients to achieve holistic balance and fulfillment in life.

Dr. Linda is the author of the book "Harmonic Healing", which is a culmination of 40 years of practice and tools that she uses for her own health and her patients. 

IN TODAY’S EPISODE, WE TALK ABOUT

  • Why your health should be the no. 1 priority you pay attention to

  • The power of our bodies' innate ability to heal themselves

  • Why you should bless your food every day

  • Her top tips to eliminate toxins and get started on a harmonic healing journey

  • How to open yourself up to receive love and heal emotionally

And so much more! 

You can find the full show notes here:
martinafink.com/podcast/129

Have you downloaded the free Perfectionist Self-Care Bundle yet? Click here to access it:
martinafink.lpages.co/perfectionist-bundle

EPISODE RESOURCES

The Milk Cleanse
Materia Medica
Books by Rudolf Steiner
Heal Thyself - Edward Bach

CONNECT WITH Dr. Linda

lightharmonics.com
Light Harmonics Instagram
Light Harmonics Facebook
Dr. Linda Lancaster Instagram

Thank you so much for listening to this episode! I'd love to hear your thoughts in the comments below! If you can think of anyone in your life who could benefit from this episode, please share it with them right now! <3

 
 

FREE BUNDLE

The 3 Steps High Achieving Perfectionists Can Take
For A Healthier Work-Life Balance

 
 

These Are The 3 Elements Included In The Perfectionist Self-Care Bundle

01 Where Is Your Self-Care At?

With this quick assessment workbook, you will be able to detect where you're at with your self-care and what your next step is to improve the quality time you spend recharging yourself.

02 Why Is Self-Care Important for Perfectionists? And How Do I Start?

Self-care is key for a healthy work-life balance for high achievers. You work a lot and you're easily stressed, right? Get my top 6 tips to kickstart your self-care without feeling overwhelmed. Shift from "doing" to "being" and find peace in your busy life.

03 Full Body Stress-Release Meditation

Stress and overwhelm isn't jut in the mind. It also shows in your cells, your muscle tension, and your hormones. Relaxation start with releasing stress from the physical body. Take a moment to relax every single part of your body to get grounded again.


DISCLAIMER

All material in this episode is provided for your information only and may not be construed as medical advice or instruction. No action or inaction should be taken based solely on the contents of this podcast episode. Instead, readers should consult appropriate health professionals on any matter relating to their health and well-being.

The information and opinions expressed here are believed to be accurate, based on the best judgement available to the speakers, and readers and listeners who fail to consult with appropriate health authorities assume the risk of any injuries. In addition, the information and opinions expressed here do not necessarily reflect the views of every contributor. The Company acknowledges occasional differences in opinion and welcomes the exchange of different viewpoints.

#9 Natural Deodorants, Living An Active Life And Taking Action Now

 
#9 Email : Blog.png
 

Sarah Moret is the founder & CEO of Curie Deodorant. Curie is an aluminum-free natural deodorant, that represents the simple belief that women can live healthier lives, starting with products they use on their bodies every day. Before starting Curie, Sarah worked as an investor, met hundreds of entrepreneurs, and was inspired by many of their journeys.

After learning about the harmful effects of aluminum, parabens, and other chemicals that are found in conventional antiperspirants, she tried every natural deodorant on the market and couldn’t find one that could keep up with her active lifestyle. So she decided to make herown. And that’s how Curie was born!

IN TODAY'S EPISODE, WE TALK ABOUT

  • Why it's important to not only eat organic, but also care for your body from the outside

  • How to decypher beauty product ingredients and why not all chemicals are bad

  • Why any action is better than no action if you have a dream you want to work towards / not ONE DAY

  • Charity and why giving back is something you should start doing now

And so much more! 

EPISODE RESOURCES

Paula's Choice Ingredient Dictionary
Ishmael - Daniel Quinn
Plastic Ocean Documentary
Glow Camp Retreats

Use the Coupon Code GLOWLIFE10 for US orders to get 10% OFF your Curie Deodorant!

CONNECT WITH SARAH

www.curiebod.com
instagram.com/curiedeodorant
facebook.com/curiedeodorant

Thank you so much for listening to this episode! I'd love to hear your thoughts in the comments below! If you can think of anyone in your life who could benefit from this episode, please share it with them right now! <3

DISCLAIMER

All material in this episode is provided for your information only and may not be construed as medical advice or instruction. No action or inaction should be taken based solely on the contents of this podcast episode. Instead, readers should consult appropriate health professionals on any matter relating to their health and well-being.

The information and opinions expressed here are believed to be accurate, based on the best judgement available to the speakers, and readers and listeners who fail to consult with appropriate health authorities assume the risk of any injuries. In addition, the information and opinions expressed here do not necessarily reflect the views of every contributor. The Company acknowledges occasional differences in opinion and welcomes the exchange of different viewpoints.

#4 Finding Joy And Stepping Out Of Your Comfort Zone With Bridget Raateland

 
Bridget Raateland
 

Bridget Jane is a Certified Holistic Health Coach, Self Development Writer and Reiki Practitioner. She is from New Zealand, but based in Barcelona, where she works with women to create clarity and cultivate breakthroughs during energy healing and intuitive transformation sessions.

She is a nature lover, travel junkie and manifestation expert that is passionate about all things mind, body, soul and living a mindful, non toxic lifestyle. Bridget is committed to creating a ripple effect of happiness and healing by helping others understand there is more than one way to medicate, educate, live and love!

IN TODAY'S EPISODE, WE CHAT ABOUT

  • How she stepped out of her comfort zone and moved from NZ to Europe

  • The importance of health and why taking care of your body should be your no. 1 priority

  • Finding joy every single day to live a happy life

  • The fears that often creep in, and how to overcome them

  • What limiting beliefs REALLY are and how to turn them into a supportive force for your happiness

And so much more!

EPISODE RESOURCES

You Can Heal Your Life - Louise Hay
Conversations with God - Neil Donald Walsh
The Glow Camp Retreat in Bali

CONNECT WITH BRIDGET

bridget-jane.com
instagram.com/_bridget_jane

Thank you so much for listening to this episode! I'd love to hear your thoughts in the comments below! If you can think of anyone in your life who could benefit from this episode, please share it with them right now! <3

DISCLAIMER

All material in this episode is provided for your information only and may not be construed as medical advice or instruction. No action or inaction should be taken based solely on the contents of this podcast episode. Instead, readers should consult appropriate health professionals on any matter relating to their health and well-being.

The information and opinions expressed here are believed to be accurate, based on the best judgement available to the speakers, and readers and listeners who fail to consult with appropriate health authorities assume the risk of any injuries. In addition, the information and opinions expressed here do not necessarily reflect the views of every contributor. The Company acknowledges occasional differences in opinion and welcomes the exchange of different viewpoints.